Spicy Chipotle Seasoned Fries at McDonald’s

Spicy Chipotle Seasoned Fries at McDonald'sLocation: 30 Courtneypark Drive East, Mississauga
Website: https://www.mcdonalds.com/ca/en-ca.html

The Spicy Chipotle Seasoned Fries aren’t the most exciting new item at McDonald’s — they’re just fries with some seasoning on them.

And when I popped open the box, I was skeptical.  The way the spice blend was mounded onto the fries, there was no way they could be good.  That’s too much seasoning, isn’t it?

Spicy Chipotle Seasoned Fries at McDonald's

They were actually pretty tasty.  The profound amount of seasoning on the fries (particularly the ones on top) made me assume that the flavour was going to be overwhelming, but it was more subtle than I was expecting.  There was a lot, but it worked.

The seasoning is lightly zingy, with a decent chipotle flavour and a mild hit of spice.  It’s not too salty, which is good because if it were, it would have been inedible.

Spicy Chipotle Seasoned Fries at McDonald's

The effect is basically like a cross between a flavoured bag of chips and French fries.  It’s quite tasty.  The only real downside is the presence of garlic and onion powder in the spice mix, which means you’re going to be stuck with a lingering aftertaste for hours after you eat it.

Lay’s Bar-B-Q Tenders at KFC

Lay's Bar-B-Q Tenders at KFCLocation: 3015 Winston Churchill Boulevard, Mississauga
Website: https://www.kfc.ca/

Coating a piece of fried chicken in flavoured potato chips is pretty bizarre; it’s also obvious enough that I’m surprised KFC or some other fast food chain hasn’t done it sooner.  This is particularly odd in a post Doritos Locos world, where mashing up two seemingly disparate but complementary flavours has revealed itself to be a gold mine.

Lay's Bar-B-Q Tenders at KFC

Anyway, KFC has finally done it, and yeah, it’s good.

The Lay’s Bar-B-Q Tenders, according to KFC: “Canadian farm raised chicken tenders coated in Lay’s sweet and smoky Bar-B-Q potato chips”.

Lay's Bar-B-Q Tenders at KFC

The flavour is pleasingly familiar, with a nice balance of sweetness and tanginess; if you’ve had Lay’s BBQ chips, then it tastes as you’d expect.  The whole thing is exactly what you think (and hope) it’s going to be.

I will say, however, that these taste like they were made with plain chips and then seasoned post-fry.  This is mostly not an issue, aside from the fact that the seasoning is a bit uneven.

Lay's Bar-B-Q Tenders at KFC

Still, it’s a good quality chicken strip; the BBQ flavour complements it well, and the chip pieces add a nice crunch.  It’s one of those things that sounds weird on paper, but mostly just tastes pretty good (i.e. it’s not a Double Down, which is a fun gimmick until you actually eat it).

This is entirely down to the luck of the draw, but my order was hot and fresh, which definitely helped.  The chicken could have been a bit more tender, but for white meat, it’s not bad.

The Plant-Based, Beyond Meat P.L.T. at McDonald’s

Beyond Meat Burger (PLT) at McDonald'sLocation: 980 Dundas Street, Woodstock
Website: https://www.mcdonalds.com/ca/en-ca.html

What have I been up to today?  Oh, you know, not much, just driving 120 kilometres to try a veggie burger at McDonald’s.  That’s 120 kilometres one way, so 240 kilometres total, or about three hours of driving.

You know, a totally rational, normal way to spend a Monday.  Not crazy at all.

Yes, in case you haven’t heard, McDonald’s recently embraced the inevitable and announced that they’re going to be joining the increasingly crowded fake meat game.

They’ve teamed up with Beyond Meat, probably the most famous purveyor of veggie burgers that (supposedly) taste like the real deal, and they’re testing them out at 28 locations in and around London, Ontario.

Beyond Meat Burger (PLT) at McDonald's

The faux-burger is called the P.L.T. (Plant, Lettuce and Tomato), and they describe it on their website as “a juicy, plant-based patty made with Beyond Meat® and served on a sesame seed bun with tomato, lettuce, pickles, onions, mayo-style sauce, ketchup, mustard, and a slice of processed cheddar cheese.”

It’s… fine, I guess?  It’s a Beyond Meat burger through and through, so if you’ve had one of those, then you know what to expect.  The McDonald’s publicity machine is claiming that they’ve been working with Beyond Meat to create a custom patty that matches the flavour of their standard burgers, and maybe that’s true.  But if it is, I certainly couldn’t tell.

The advance buzz — that this tastes just like a regular McDonald’s burger — is absolutely, positively not the case.  It’s basically fine for what it is, but unless it’s been many, many years since you’ve had a burger at the Golden Arches, you’re not going to be fooled.

Beyond Meat Burger (PLT) at McDonald's

The biggest issues are the taste and the texture (so… everything, basically).  The flavour is vaguely meat-like, but it also tastes off and lacks anything even remotely resembling beefiness.  It’s not gross, but it kind of falls into the uncanny valley of hamburgers.

The texture is about the same — close, but not quite there.  It vaguely approximates an actual hamburger, but again, it’s off; it’s a bit too soft and mushy.

I recently had the Beyond Burger at Tim Hortons; this is going to sound completely insane, but that one was better.  In this particular case, Tim Hortons’ incompetence worked in their favour — the patty had obviously been cooked in advance and kept warm, which dried it out a bit and helped to reduce the off-putting squishy texture.

Beyond Meat Burger (PLT) at McDonald's

Everything else about the burger was fine — the many condiments were all McDonald’s standbys, and they were all tasty enough.

Honestly, it could have used more toppings.  The patty was still the dominant flavour, and in this case that’s definitely not a good thing.  The version at Tim Hortons was more successful in covering up the flavour of the patty with a welcome deluge of assertive condiments.

Is this worth a three hour drive?  For a maniac like me who’s eaten at McDonald’s all over the world, maybe?  For everyone else, absolutely not.  It’s fine for what it is, but when Tim friggin’ Hortons is beating you at your own game, you know you’re in trouble.

Mexican Chipotle Burger at McDonald’s

McDonald's Mexican Chipotle Burger - McTastersLocation: 1138 Victoria Street North, Kitchener
Website: https://www.mcdonalds.com/ca/en-ca.html

McDonald’s recently came out with a couple of “new” (I’m pretty sure both have been on the menu before) items called McTasters: the Thai Sweet Chili Chicken Sandwich, and the Mexican Chipotle Burger.

I tried the Mexican Chipotle Burger, and it was surprisingly decent.  It’s definitely one of the better new things I’ve tried at McDonald’s recently.

McDonald's Mexican Chipotle Burger - McTasters

The burger comes with “chipotle aioli sauce, crispy tortilla strips and a juicy beef patty, all on a toasted sesame and paprika ciabatta bun.”

It’s tasty.  The chipotle aioli sauce basically tastes like the dressing you’ll find on any number of Southwest salads, only with a mild spicy kick.  The crunchy tortilla strips add a nice bit of texture, and the cheese (which is unmentioned on the menu for some reason) ties it all together.

McDonald's Mexican Chipotle Burger - McTasters

The bun is interesting, too — it’s chewier and more dense than the typical McDonald’s bun, but it works.

It helps that the beef is the classic small McDonald’s patty, and not the Angus or the Quarter Pounder patty that they use in most of their limited-time items.  When it comes to the beef at McDonald’s, less is more; the slim old-school patty is the perfect size.

Fried Chicken and Spaghetti at Jollibee

JollibeeLocation: 800 Boyer Boulevard, Mississauga (inside Seafood City Supermarket)
Website: http://jollibeecanada.com/

Jollibee opened locations in Scarborough and Mississauga in the last couple of years, and they were both immediately swamped.  People love Jollibee with a passion that’s unusual in the world of fast food.

I tried visiting the Mississauga location a couple of times when it first opened, and both times the line was way too intense.  But I figured it was safe enough to give it another shot, and yeah, the extreme crowds have died down.  I showed up at around 11:20 AM on a Friday and was able to order immediately, though by the time I left a line had already formed.

Jollibee

I ordered the Crispy Chicken Perfect Pair, which comes with a piece of fried chicken, Jolly Spaghetti, and a drink.

I assumed I’d like the fried chicken (and I did), but the spaghetti was a bit more of a question mark.  It’s topped with meat sauce with chunks of hot dog mixed in, and it’s notorious for being quite sweet.  I was expecting something in line with Chef Boyardee.

It’s interesting; the sauce is, as advertised, quite sweet.  But it’s also tangy, and kind of reminded me of a cross between a traditional tomato sauce and barbecue sauce.  It feels like it shouldn’t work, but it kinda does.  The salty hot dog slices help to round out the sweetness, as does the cheese on top.

Jollibee

The spaghetti itself isn’t exactly al dente, but it’s not mushy, either.  The whole thing is oddly compelling.  I liked it.

The fried chicken is more straightforward.  It basically tastes like KFC original recipe, but with a slightly more subtle flavour.  The chicken was nicely crispy on its exterior and very juicy inside.  It’s a quality piece of fried chicken.

Jollibee

Even the gravy is a bit more unique than you might think; it’s definitely not the typical brown gravy you’ll find at a fast food joint.  It’s a little bit sweet, and there’s a spice in there I couldn’t quite put my finger on.  It works really well with the fried chicken.

I ordered the peach mango pie for dessert, which is crispy and fried, as it should be.  The filling is basically a fruit-flavoured goo (there were maybe like two or three tiny bits of fruit in there), but it’s still quite tasty.  It’s basically impossible to go wrong with a deep fried pie.

Jollibee

Okay: I get it.  I get the lines.  It’s certainly not the best thing ever, but I can see why people who grew up with Jollibee have a deep fondness for the place.  It’s pretty unique.